yes change.

feels like the past.
feels great.
feels like my missing friendship pieces have come together as one.

may 31 2010 gained me some happiness.
actually may 28-31 201o gained me some happiness.

im perfectly content, idk what made me sad but its gone now.

change, but missing.

change is starting.
my two bestfriends, are once again friends again.
IM HAPPY.

some part of my heart is getting their pieces together.
starting to feel complete.
but yet i still have some kind of sadness in me.
it wont escape till i find that happiness.

what is that happiness im seeking for?
is it love im seeking for?
my old best friend?
my dad?

what is that im missing?

exposed.

my inner feelings (:

eh, im not going to let it get to me.
even though it already did.
buttttt again, its life.
it has its moments.

bible verse.

JOHN 4:16

“ There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.”

soon to be tattoo on the side of my body, "there is no fear in love"

love triangle.

love triangle, im in this situation.
im so confused on what is true love, because i dont think true love exists in a love triangle.
HE ME SHE HER.
he wants me but yet he deeply wants her.
her has someone else now, if her didnt would they be together?
me wants he.
if he was still her would we be together?
she wants he.
me doesn't want to feel this way with he when he has she and her.

its a love triangle.
can true love exist in a love triangle.
he makes me happy, he always puts a smile on my face.
any guy can, but he just knows how to and i know how to for him.
was it really meant to be?


i guess in the future will see, cause i DO NOT want to be in this love triangle.
he put himself through it. i got myself out.......i think?

struck.

the words i read just gave me the worst stomach ache, not to mention heartache.
the ones you love most you hurt the most, or they hurt you the most.
all is done.
i got struck with happiness to being struck with no happiness in a quick sec.
sad, but its life.
life has its free fall during its roller coaster ride, cant live without those.
free falls are they best but yet worst part of the roller coaster.
but it makes the roller coaster better which makes you want to keep riding along.
its life, its love.

the cure of hope and music.

lately music had been the cure for everything for me right now.
it sooths me, its just relaxes me.
it helps me, its my cure.
the words in songs explains so much that i have to say.
mostly love wise. just music is amazing to me.
and every little beat combines into something entertaining putting together all at once.
music is amazing to me.
music is my cure.

thats all i need, because all i want is someone to love.
but since i cant express my emotions upon love music subsitutes 'my love'.

i've noticed as well, since i have no one to love.
i go back to one person and remember it how the feeling of love is.
not the one far away, but the one near by.
i really messed up on that one.
i miss him alot.

hope is all i have right now for picking up the pieces between us.
i hope you will put it back together with me.
i just have to pick up the first piece by saying hi, hopefully you will say hi back.
or respond by something.
hope is all i got.