The new year is coming around and I still have no love to be found.
2009,2010,2011, now 2012...............I'm speechless.

It is quite sad how I have no one to talk to about love but my blog.
I just want someone to listen, to care what they Are listening about.
Or act like they care.

One day.
Like I always say.

Confession

YES. I am emotionally damaged, but yet I still believe in true love.
I tell myself 'one day' It will be just like the movies.
Of course I deny love all the time because ... Well I am emotionally damaged.
Haha I don't really know the reason, but that's the genereal idea of why my reason is.
I want love so bad it makes want to cry. I hate waiting I just want it too happen.
I see a boy I think is cute I just want him to be the one.
But it's not like that. He has to be my friend first, bestfriend.
That's easy all my guys are friends.
I want someone I can call anytime, or send just call to tell them something the moment it happens because they are the first person I want to tell.
Yup; I admit I am a hopeless romantic. I want it to be just like the movies.
Something is wrong with me, but all I can do is be happy with my life now.
And be even happier when my life becomes a movie, if that will ever happen.
You see, I'm always second best. I make myself second best. I do this to myself.
That's my fault and I know it's wrong, but that's how I learn, the hard way.
I set myself up for heartbreak when that's the thing I try to avoid but yet I know how to get thru the cracks.
I'm something aren't I?
Who wants to deal with this? I expect so much but want so little.
The feeling of love.
Corny..yes.

There is more to life than love.

Today, I was talking to a guy. A rare guy I'd never thought I would run to and had the conversation I had today.
As I listening to him, I could tell the reason why he was saying those things was from heartbreak.
It's absolutely funny how heartbreak can change everything.
It changes how you think, feel, things you do.
The common thing heartbreak does to people is the lack of trust in other people.
But what I learned from this guy, and what he learned from heartbreak is that there is more to life than love.
WE ALL WANT LOVE. We have this mindset of what we want, but we can never find it because we are expecting too much.
But when we don't expect it at all, it could be something absolutely incredible or nothing at all.
Anyways, what I'm trying to say is we as humans can live life without love.
Of course we will feel a little emptiness in our hearts and feel like we are missing something,
BUT not having love doesn't keep away from happiness.
We learn alot from love, but that's only a small portion we experience in our life.
There is alot in life besides love.
We need to, let me rephrase, I need to accept that love is something I shouldn't always be trying to find.